That’s ok @Eric is would have been too busy to read yesterday. We were playing the new drinking game “Stir-Crazy”.
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what about morning-drinking? 
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Best hangover cure ever!
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I’ve been working in the garden today, and tore out an entire 8’x4’ bed of mint (so I can plant Vegetables, which we generally do). A woman walking by said, from 8’ away, “Look at all those Mojito’s!“ I can’t say I haven’t thought exactly the same thing. Maybe I should’ve figured out how to make some rum? Then I could’ve had drunk thoughts to post here! 
Instead I dried the mint for tea. Much less hilarious than 50 gallons of mojito’s. 
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Funny…I would have though Mint Juleps, not Mojitos. 50 gallons of Mojitos would be onerous for me, whereas 50 gallons of Juleps would be a delight. Potato, potahto I guess.
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Or if you really want to be a bastard, make a Caipirinha and add mint. People’s head will explode. Bet its tasty though.
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Sounds delish!
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I was dead-ass sober last night but I saw my neighbor’s man business.
I was on my porch on a phone call. I happened to glance up, and in his upstairs big ass double window that was fully lit, no curtains drawn, he was very thoroughly drying himself post-shower. It was like a well lit second feature at a drive in theater.
I expected to spend close time with my family during Coronatine. I was not expecting this much closeness with my neighbors.
This experience does reinforce my belief that men think their packages are a gift for the whole world…just as an unrelated sidenote.
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That was you? You shoulda waved!
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Actually Alli, this thread is the gift that keeps on giving…
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Sounds like midnight catfishing…
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Just opened my front curtains to get sunlight on my tomato plants and BOOM! Dick and balls in the front window across the street. And this time the girlfriend was there, too.
My husband has been deputized for this conversation. We have kids. We can’t have dick shows going across the street 24/7.
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That’s because the hangover from Caipirinha is legendary.
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Any chance your neighbors are Dick and Jane? (Sorry @T1Allison, I couldn’t pass that one up)
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The hilarious thing is that their last name turns out to be one of the more common euphemisms for penis. What are the odds??
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You live next to Bill and Betsy VaginaMiner?!
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How’d you guess?
Dang, @Eric, now all the FUD creepers will be able to figure out where I live with that sort of clue!
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The Candy Man The Sausage Man
by Sammy Davis Jr.Who gets up at sunrise (who gets up at sunrise)
With his mornin’ wood (with his mornin’ wood)
Goes to his window and gives a show that’s goodThe Sausage Man (the Sausage Man)
Oh, the Sausage Man can (the Sausage Man can)
The Sausage Man can 'cause he shows off his love
And makes Alli’s day good (makes Alli’s day good)Who can take his doogan (who can take his doogan)
And make the ladies sigh (And make the ladies sigh)
He points it out the window whenever he says “Hi”The Sausage Man (the Sausage Man)
Oh, the Sausage Man can (the Sausage Man can)
The Sausage Man can 'cause he shows off his love
And makes Alli’s day good (makes Alli’s day good)The Sausage Man makes
Every day he wakes
Satisfying and fulfilling
The neighbor ladies are so willing
His pecker is worth every shillingOh, don’t wait 'till tomorrow (don’t wait 'till tomorrow)
'Cuz it might be too late (it might be too late)
Hurry up Alli and go on your wanker dateThe Sausage Man (the Sausage Man)
Oh, the Sausage Man can (the Sausage Man can)
The Sausage Man can 'cause he shows off his love
And makes Alli’s day good (makes Alli’s day good)The Sausage Man makes
Every day he wakes
Satisfying and fulfilling
The neighbor ladies are so willing
His pecker is worth every shillingYeah, yeah, yeah, don’t wait 'till tomorrow (don’t wait 'till tomorrow)
'Cuz it might be too late (it might be too late)
Hurry up Alli and go on your wanker dateThe Sausage Man (the Sausage Man)
Oh, the Sausage Man can (the Sausage Man can)
The Sausage Man can 'cause he shows off his love
And makes Alli’s day good (makes Alli’s day good)Yes the Sausage Man can 'cause he shows off his love
And makes Alli’s day good (makes Alli’s day good)A Sausage Man, a Sausage Man, a Sausage Man
(And makes Alli’s day good)
A Sausage Man, a Sausage Man, a Sausage Man
(And makes Alli’s day good)
¡ʎɐp slooℲ lᴉɹd∀ ʎddɐH
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