We all shine somewhere!!!
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I read with great delight your colonoscopy story… as I prep for mine…
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Good luck!
Don’t ask about your ass! They don’t like that question!
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I wouldn’t even entertain asking… I would have to a posterior of excellence to consider making such a remark and I certainly don’t. On the other hand…I might consider making cracks about ordering food to go for after to procedure, and do they deliver to the recovery room.
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I am just beginning the serious part of prep for a colonoscopy scheduled for tomorrow morning. It’s a wretched night I’ve got ahead of me and I’m not looking forward to it.
This is my 4th colonoscopy - I get them every 5 years as I had a large polyp removed about 15 years ago. I don’t have any particular story aside from what everyone knows - prep really sucks.
Here I go again…
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Maybe they will give you a sticker or discount when you hit 5. Good luck with the prep. The last one my wife and I did wasn’t nearly as bad as the old Gallon of PEG to down. yuck. That prep sucked bad.
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That’s what I’ve got ahead of me - well, just a half gallon - but it’s laced with a huge amount of PEG.
I’m jealous that you have some other kind of prep approach. I’m supposed to start the PEG part of the prep 20 minutes ago. I’m procrastinating…
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You do the prep together? Now that’s true love.
My one and only colonoscopy was totally routine, nothing to write about, except I didn’t see the doctor who did it until afterwards, and I have no idea what he reported because I was mesmerized by his eyes, which were surrounded by all these little wrinkles like anuses. Occupational hazard, I guess.
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I think we should have a FUD short story contest in which everyone has to write a story that concludes with that exact phrase.
And what if all doctors end up slowly taking on the physical appearance of whatever body part they specialize in? Kinda like how dog owners start to look like their dogs and they have similar injuries and infirmities!
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As I mentioned above, this was my fourth colonoscopy as docs had removed a polyps back 20 years ago so now I’m high risk and have to get them every 5 years.
I have a “great colon” according to the physician who performed the procedure. So no issues!
The docs all say that recovery from a colonoscopy is quick, but for me it’s more than a day - it takes a while for my stomach to begin to feel right again after having been violated by all that PEG. I think about rebuilding the biome in my stomach.
Anyway today (Sunday) is the first day that my stomach has felt okay - and the procedure was Thursday.
Well I’m done with mine for the next 5 years or so.
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I have to share my ass story from a cardiac cauterization. The gave be some pills, muscle relaxer and ValiumL, I think. At the time I worked midnight shift and I could fall asleep while a dental hygienist worked on me 
So that cocktail of drugs put me out.
Towards the end of the procedure I woke up, and the cardiologist noticed. “Hi, were almost done, I’m going to push some more contrast and you might feel a heat sensation around your chest.”
Well I felt heat alright but not the chest, “Hey doc, I didn’t feel that in my chest but my ass. Does this mean my heart is in my ass?” Quiet response while the team muffled laughter, “Sometimes that happens.”
Later in recovery while my wife and son were in the room, the doctor came in with the results, “His heart is clean, but I don’t know about pure.”
Wife to me, “What did YOU say?”
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I used to work in the cath lab, the stories are priceless. You got a good humored doc right there.
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As a postscript to my contribution to this fascinating colonoscopy thread (every bulletin board should have one) … I just got the following ‘thank-you’ card in the US Mail the other day from the Cambridge Health Alliance Dept of Gatroenterology. Has anyone else had this kind of post-procedure followup???
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Didn’t get one of those, perhaps it is because my ass is ugly? Not sure. Even so, it is kind of weird the lengths that medical facilities will go to improve their post procedure evaluations.
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Definitely have not ever received one of those.
I feel like a colonoscopy is one of the weirder procedures to send a personal card for.
But I will overshare (again) that as weird as my butt predicaments were, the strangest medical experience I’ve had is hands down the pandemic influenced woman’s annual exam. It is weird as hell to be wearing a face mask but be otherwise buck ass naked under fluorescent lighting. Paper gowns don’t count as clothes when stirrups are involved. I’m just glad I’ve already had kids and am totally over the whole embarrassed part of the equation. But it’s still freakin’ weird.
Sorry for ruining your thread for a second time, @daisymae. I cannot promise that it’s the last time.
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I got asked out on a few dates after my last scope
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Better check your statement, I bet they charged you…You’ll will remember the $500 card…lol
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I am re-surrecting this thread because I had to have a colonoscopy for the first time in 40 years. And I carefully planned for it. I was being completely knocked out for it. I tested my basal beforehand, then I only had a protein shake for a couple of days to test a reduced level because of not eating much. I tried 2/3rds but I went up to 230 in about 3 hours. So I did the newly tested lower refined levels mostly leaving out my DP and FOTF extra, because sometimes I don’t have it or it varies. I worked on it for about 4-5 days. I figured I would aim for around 150 to make them happy as long as I stay sort of stable. Can you tell I’m a little OCD and I also really hate being knocked out?
My doctors instructions said to take half my insulin the day before when I am on only clear liquids and none the day of. When the nurse handed me that I said I can’t do that, I’ll be over 300 in hours on even just half. There aren’t very many adult type 1’s on the island, I figured the gastro doctor probably didn’t run into too many of us and the instructions are aimed at type 2’s on insulin. I did call and ask, just in case I need to have some sugar, sugar on the tongue, apple juice or? They said a little apple juice, just don’t guzzle, but I don’t think she knew I was going to be knocked out when I asked that. I was allowed clear liquids up to 4 hours before the procedure so it probably wasn’t going to be an issue anyways.
And then the best laid plans. The day before I stayed at around 125, pretty much a flatline. I was only allowed clear liquids and I just had 2 glasses of vegetable cube broth which has no carbs, iced tea and water. Everything’s going great. My prep liquid is ClearPiq. I’m to drink one bottle at 4pm the day before. Sigh a lot of time in the restroom and after about a half hour of it my BG level kept insisting on dropping. Apple juice. gulps (1-2oz) when I needed it, got sick of that real quick. But I remembered I had real Reed’s Ginger Ale, much better. I had wondered what the drink/laxative would cause blood sugar wise. I could not get above 110. Not good, so I reduced basal, not working enough. Finally reduced it to 50%. Second dose at 1 am. 30-60 minutes after drinking it my BG level shot up to 184 and still climbing slowly. Not good. I could accept the 184, but not the still climbing. I reached 210 and I decide to take some insulin, and back to my newly tested level. I stayed steady, but I wouldn’t drop, but I was giving small doses. I was trying to make sure it didn’t all hit suddenly and I drop under 150, at least not under 130. But nor did I want it to keep climbing, I was already pretty high.
When I arrived I finally showed signs I wasn’t going up and at least had slowly dropped to 174. I did a finger stick test and I was at 164. Good enough since I’m higher than normal. But when I actually get into my cubby hole to wait to be taken into the colonoscopy room I shoot up to 191. The nurse did a finger test and it said I was 158. I did a finger stick test and sure enough 162. What on earth is my Dexcom doing? It didn’t drop, it actually climbed more. I calibrated it, but couldn’t count on what it was doing. It was fine right before I walked in the door.
Luckily the colonscopy is only about 15-20 minutes. I came awake pretty quick, they just used propopyl. I did a finger test and I was 156. So I stayed steady. My Dexcom is still saying I’m in the 190’s. Did it get zapped with some equipment in the waiting area or? I took a Afrezza correction dose right away, set my timer to keep an eye out if it was too strong. But since it had seemed to be a stubborn high I thought it would be okay and it was.
And that stubborn high or shooting up high in the first place? It was probably my pod, but I don’t know for sure. I had placed it on my upper thigh, just to keep things clear of my abdomen. When I went to get dressed and I was still a little loopy and when I pulled up my pants I tore the pod off, it came off really easily, too easily? All that time running back to the bathroom in prep I might have dislodged it enough being on my thigh to not be giving me all my insulin, hence the sudden climb. When I changed it I did not look to see if I could see insulin, I just stuck on a new one while a very interested nurse was watching because she had never seen any insulin pump change done before. I was happy because I always figure the more they know the better.
But when I got home I fingersticked and was still in the 150’s and the Dexcom was back to saying I was in the 150’s. So now my Dexcom is working fine. My pod is securely on my stomach and working great. The colonoscopy was done to rule out things, they have pretty much decided it’s a slipping rib giving me some problems. I had it before so that’s not surprising. 40 years ago I got really sick from the gallon prep and I had major colon spasms during the test, I have avoided a colonoscopy since. Because of being a diabetic they had my test scheduled at 6:45 am. I don’t usually even go to bed before 12-1 am and then the second drink at 1 am, by the time I had stopped running to the restroom I was going to be getting up in a little over an hour. So no sleep at all. The drink was nasty stuff to drink. Sickening sweet, the second bottle made me very nauseous. Not that anyone loves a colonoscopy.
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I’m not going to belabor the point. The prep sucks, the procedure itself, as described above, nothing butt a delightful nap. Unfortunately, doo to family history I started at age 40 (now 63) and doo to the fact that they’ve had to remove precancerous polyps from me for at least the past 10 years, I’ve now got to doo it every year, so I’ve had over a dozen. I haven’t had to take any special precautions for D (my D diagnosis is still only a year old), butt I’ve done various different preps, from a gallon jug of putrid tasting hell, to pills that were much less offensive to take (butt same miserable result). Just had my annual physical and got my referral and authorization for this year’s colonoscopy. Feh. The good news: my bloodwork was great this year - A1C 5.3 (!)(down from 9.8 last year at this time), fasting BG 98, 12 pounds knocked off, etc., etc. Both general doc and endo very happy. Maybe I’ll get lucky with the colonoscopy this year too and get a 5 year break, butt somehow I doubt it.
I have edited this down several times, which is why there’s a red number 2 on top of this post.
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