I was hanging out and enjoying a pleasant lunch with a friend and he off-handedly mentioned that his friend from high school, who had type 1 diabetes, suddenly died in his sleep. My friend is 38 so this man couldn’t have been much older.
Most of the time I don’t think about those worst-case scenarios at all, but that sent me into a spiral of worry and also just triggered this vague feeling of doom and unrest – probably because I had to drive past the hospital where Samson was treated for his seizures and his T1D diagnosis, and because I had an appointment for his medical care plan for kindergarten next year. Combined with all the seizure scares earlier this year, I think I have a little bit of medical PTSD or something.
We do so much to keep Samson safe but there are still so many scary outcomes and ways the systems can fail. And one day he’ll be in charge of his health, and we’ll have limited ability to help him. How do you shake off worries like these or feelings of doom? Usually we’re pretty good at not worrying about these things and just focusing on the day-to-day but today it’s been really getting me down.
I just try and not think about it, honestly. Thinking about it makes me very stressed, frustrated and honestly, sad. But I just do my best and plan to teach him to do his best and let the cards fall where they may…that’s the best any of us can do. Any of us can die at any moment during any day for anything. All we can do is prepare, be safe, stay alert and don’t stress over those things that we have no control over and cannot change.
I think having a plan, and knowing you have a plan can help a lot (a plan you repeat in your head when the worrying hits you). Having people who you can rely on emotionally and monetarily can make a big difference too. But I suppose that depends a lot on what your worries are!!
Before I joined this site, I was really worried about losing my job or health insurance. I’m good at my job and highly valued, but sometimes things happen. I was terrified of not being able to pay for insulin or healthcare.
For complicated reasons, I couldn’t have relied on my parents or family at all for help. I’m sure friends would’ve helped where they could, but I had no real safety net.
I now have more savings, and this site, FUD, helped give me a plan in case the worst were to occur. Between ordering supplies from Canada (Sam & Michel), stockpiling current supplies, and last-resort R/NPH discussions, I have a plan! I feel like I’ve developed enough professional experience that I could get a job (even if it might pay way less). As long as I can make SOME money, I can pay for the basics- though that’d likely mean a very different lifestyle and less control. I would be okay! It might sound weird, but it’s probably one of the biggest things I’ve gotten from this site- a plan which gives me security.
Anyway, facing the problem and devising a plan to deal with it is the biggest advice I can give. After that, it’s all about living as full of a life as you can, recognizing that we don’t have complete control.
I’d rather live a full life and die at 38 than worry my whole life, not experience the amazing stuff life has to offer, and die at 65. I’d rather live to 100 and experience everything of course
I agree with what @Katers87 said. The best we can do is prepare and plan and mitigate risks within reason. I tend to be a worrier at times, and I have found making plans to mitigate a worry helps a lot. If I can’t make plans to mitigate it, then it’s out of my control and I try to not spend time worrying about it.
Ditto.
Focusing on and choosing to take action on things that can be changed.
I experience this type of situation, more so as a cancer survivor, and hearing of those who passed or had re-occurence. Try to remind myself that worrying about it is only a trigger to consider changes that increase probability of best outcome, rather than spending energy on what if…
My oldest son had cancer when he was a baby of 1 year old. He’s been in remission since age 3 (he’s 16 now). Because of the abdominal surgery he had to have for the doctors to be able to remove the remaining tumor, his internal scarring caused a very severe hospitalization and second surgery (and 2nd scar perpendicular to the 1st) for a bowl obstruction surgery, last summer. Before his hospitalization we didn’t even realize internal scarring could even cause bowl obstructions. Doctors told us that with each surgery, the risk is even greater of it occurring again in the future. But we can’t sit around worrying about it. For his sake, we all atleast understand the symptoms now so that we can address this issue if it ever rears it’s ugly head again.
Life is full of what if’s and complications. I don’t even give it a second thought. I’ve always been one of action…tell me what’s wrong and let’s fix it and move on.
