@Michel - I wasn’t diagnosed T1 until I was 22, but I have always been a person with a fair amount of anxiety, even as a child. I loved school, but still had some anxiety. Probably performance anxiety as I was always a top student. I also had anxiety about PE, something I wasn’t as good at, and often dreaded.
I wonder if something like this could be the case in your situation?
I LOVE LOVE LOVE OATMEAL; but unfortunately oatmeal does not love me back 
like you, if I want to eat oatmeal, I need a very long prebolus, and often even 45 minutes doesn’t even work out right. I think I may need a dual wave bolus, extending it over, maybe, 1-2 hours to avoid a delayed spike.
its too much work to “get it just right” that I feel like " why bother?"
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